Knucklehead 1 and Knucklehead 2 buckled their belts and situated themselves for the hour and a half flight.
Knucklehead 1: Ah, so, here we go.
Knucklehead 2: Yeah, man, to Cape Verde.
K1: To Cape Verde.
There was a pause. Their whiteness reeked. Everyone saw it, especially amongst their fellow passengers, who of mixed race and speaking numerous languages, looked to the two, but barely noticed them since they were the token white boys aboard.
K2: But, wait.
K1: Huh?
K2: Is it Cape Verde or Cabo Verde?
K1: What do you mean?
K2: I mean, what is it really – Cape Verde or Cabo Verde.
K1 wasn’t surprised. K2 always had a way of bringing up ridiculous notions, ideas, declarations that were absurd, but funny. But they were funny, really only to a select audience as others found K2 and K1 together quite obnoxious. It was this affect they had on others, though, that somehow sealed their friendship. Somehow.
K1: Well, if you speak Latin of some sort, like Spanish, Portuguese, or French, it’s Cabo Verde, but if you speak English, it’s Cape Verde.
K2: Man, come on. That doesn’t make sense, though. If I speak English – and I do – wouldn’t I call it Cape Green? Or, would that be Green Cape? And, when foreigners travel to Cape Cod, do they say let’s go to the Cabo Cod or Cabo – whatever the word for cod is in their language?
K1: What? Man, that’s ridiculous.
K2: I’m just saying. Let’s get some consistency here. Is it Cape Verde or Cabo Verde or neither? I would even go so far as to bet that if we were to ask each stewardess which was proper they would each have a different response.
K1: If your logic proves correct, then that would mean Spain is never Espana and Inglaterra is never England.
K2: That’s right. When was the last time you heard an American say I’m going to Espana – unless he/she was certain the other person knows that Espana is, in fact, Spain. You see, that’s not common knowledge. But, Cape Verde or Cabo Verde or Cape Green or Green Cape is different. I would bet 3 out of 5 Americans would think Cape Verde and Cabo Verde were 2 different countries.
K1: 3 out of 5?
K2: Well, maybe 2.75 out of 5.
K1: Oh, so you count 75th’s of people now? Why don’t you just give a whole number?
K2: Man, you always multiply by 100 when giving stats out of 5 so that would be 275 out of 500.
K1: What?
K1 could no longer hold it. He laughed until he coughed. He laughed like that time K2 modestly said he would carry the bag for both of them while hiking and after the first day of the hike K1 and the others realized K2 had carried over 100 pounds that day on a 8 mile hike, like that time he, K2, and that other guy linked hands and grabbed the electric fence to see how fast the shock would penetrate to the last man, like that time that other guy lost the bet and bit into the centipede that shot poison out and numbed his mouth for 5 hours, like that time they went on a week long juice diet – just to do it – and lasted only 13 hours after realizing the juice they drank was full of sugar and they all had the runs for the rest of the day.
K2: Man, I’m just saying.
K1: Yeah, you’re probably right.
And during their trip this was the debate they reenacted, which was seemingly stupid to the outside ear, but completely meaningful to the existence of their knucklehead friendship.
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